Thursday, November 30, 2006

Television at its best.

So, here in the UK they are nice enough to give us Americans a channel called Five US. On this superb station, they tease you with a taste of good ole American entertainment…Happy Days…NASCAR…CSI…but, this past Tuesday night, they really outdid themselves.

9pm: Crazy Legs Conti: Zen and the Art of Competitive Eating
10pm: Combover: The Movie

I mean, wow! Those blockbusters outside of season sweeps…unbelievable. Since I’m sure you’re all quite disappointed you missed it, I’ve decided to post a few gems below. Sit back. Relax. And enjoy.


Crazy Legs Conti: Zen and the Art of Competitive Eating

“I’m just honored I was there. It was a moment not only in competitive eating history, but in all of history.” – Crazy Legs Conti on the demi-god of eating Takeru Kobayashi’s then record 50 and 1/2-dog performance at the at the Super Bowl of Competitive Eating, Nathans Coney Island Hot Dog Eating Contest.

On the bus on the way to Coney Island:
Conti: How many did you eat your rookie year?
Eric ‘Badlands’ Booker^: Uhhh, 15 and a half.
Conti: Wow, you've made a 12-dog improvement over what, just 4 years…man, that’s my inspiration.

More Crazy Legs on Kobayashi …
“I think he took the energy, the crowd, the hundreds of cameras broadcasting this worldwide, and channeled it – into his stomach.”

“My stomach wasn’t just full, my heart was full, just to be on the same stage as Kobayashi.”

And, finally, Max DePaola on Kobayashi…
“Kobayashi, yeah, he definitely makes six figures.”

This post was paid for in part by the IFOCE ** www.ifoce.com **



^ My hero: http://www.ifoce.com/eaters.php?action=detail&sn=14

He has excited fans at recent events by performing selections from his rap albums, Hungry & Focused, and The Ingestion Engine, and he remains among the most popular eaters in America.

Booker's efforts at the table, however, have produced mixed results in 2005 and 2006. After a very strong 2004, in which he achieved victories in cannoli, cheesecake and pumpkin pie, Badlands' consistency disappeared.

He lost to a 110-pound girl in this 11-lb burger competition.
But hey, it’s aight dog, I still love you.


Combover: The Movie

Combover/Comb-over: n. An arrangement of hair on a balding man in which hair from the side of the head is combed over the bald spot.

“There were historians in Ancient Rome who wrote about the combover. It was reviled even then.” – Baldness expert

“There is nothing more contemptible than a bald man who pretends to have hair.”
- Marcus Valerius Martialis, Roman poet, 98 A.D.

“If you don’t get out of my face I will kill you.” – Man, sporting extreme combover, after being approached to share his thoughts on the subject.

One devotee of the combover said it best: "Finally someone is going to record for posterity the dying art of the combover. Nowadays people are too quick to get transplants or wear toupees."

http://www.comboverthemovie.com/

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